All Wounds Are Not Visible

Parental psychological abuse, sometimes termed parental psychological maltreatment, is notoriously difficult to pinpoint and define—more so than its physical or sexual counterparts. This complexity stems from factors like diverse parenting norms across cultures, a general lack of awareness, and the absence of physical signs. This form of abuse includes behaviours such as verbal assaults—shouting, criticising, insulting—as well as emotional neglect or rejection, where a parent might withhold affection or ignore the child's emotional needs. Although these actions don't leave physical marks, they can inflict deep emotional scars, leading to feelings of being unloved, unwanted, or insecure, which severely impacts self-worth.

Despite common perceptions that it's less damaging than physical forms of abuse, psychological abuse by parents can lead to outcomes that are just as severe. Adolescents subjected to this form of abuse face an increased risk of struggling academically, engaging in delinquent behaviours, and developing mental health issues such as depression, anxiety, drug and alcohol misuse, and post-traumatic stress disorder. The repercussions can extend into adulthood, manifesting as eating disorders, suicidal behaviour and mental health challenges.

Identifying Risk Factors

The risk factors for parental psychological abuse are varied but can include parents who experienced abuse themselves and may not recognise the same behaviour as damaging. Stressors such as financial strain, lack of emotional support, drug or alcohol misuse, or other mental health challenges, as well as a poor understanding of child development, can also contribute to the prevalence of this abuse.

Steps Parents Can Take

To combat the effects of psychological abuse, parents need to take proactive measures. Educating themselves about the abuse and its impact on young people is vital. By understanding children's developmental stages, parents can set realistic expectations about their child’s behaviour. Developing healthy coping strategies for stress, seeking support networks, and managing financial pressures are crucial in minimising tendencies toward abusive behaviour.

Creating a nurturing environment is essential. This includes showing consistent love, affection, and support, validating children's feelings, recognising past errors, and considering therapy if personal issues affect one's ability to provide a safe emotional space. By fostering an emotionally connected and supportive home, parents can significantly bolster their children's resilience and overall mental health, shielding them from the lasting damage of psychological abuse.

Take Action Now

If you suspect that a child may be experiencing psychological abuse, or if you recognise any of the risk factors in your own family, or parenting do not wait. Seek help from professionals such as child or adolescent psychologists or family therapists who can provide guidance and intervention. Remember, recognising the problem is the first step to healing. Let's work together to ensure our children grow up in healthy, supportive environments. Reach out, speak up, and help pave the way for change.

Fontana Roach, Registered Counselling Psychologist, Adolescent Mental Health Specialist