The Relational Practices

View Original

From Planning to Bonding: How to Create a Joyful family Summer

Introduction

As a couple and family therapist, I always advocate for the joy of shared experiences. These moments are not just about having fun; they are about fortifying and renewing family connections, enhancing bonds, and creating lasting memories. With summer here, children at home, and many adults having more flexible schedules, there is a golden opportunity to create these memorable moments.

Overcoming Economic Challenges

Summer in Barbados and the Caribbean often recalls travelling to North America or the United Kingdom. However, the current economic stress and high cost of living can make an overseas holiday a distant dream for many families. Whether a family is travelling or staying home, enjoyable experiences are within reach. Spending quality time at home or travelling can open a world of possibilities for fun and engaging activities, sparking excitement and eagerness for the upcoming season. It is a chance to discover new hobbies, unleash creativity, and strengthen family bonds.

Planning for Enjoyable Experiences

However, to make it about family, several things might need to be considered when planning a holiday, including involving family members in the planning process, balancing different factors, and doing things that allow different generations to have fun.

Key Principles for Successful Family Planning

One of the key principles I share with families is, “It's not just what we do, but how we do it.” Involving family members early in planning holiday activities is not just a suggestion but a way to make everyone feel deeply valued and included. This can involve family meetings, brainstorming sessions, and assigning different roles to family members in planning. The goal is to ensure that everyone's voice is heard and valued and that everyone feels a vital part of the process.

The Importance of Family Meetings

Family life is often taken for granted, and in the business of life, the thought of a family meeting might not be a priority, particularly in a culture where family life tends to be hierarchical. However, a family meeting can give everyone a voice in holiday planning. Meetings can also allow multiple generations, including seniors and little ones, to have a voice and a role.

I usually encourage families to organise meetings; organised meetings tend to be more successful. Organising or structuring a meeting involves setting a regular meeting time, having an agenda, and giving family members different responsibilities in facilitating the meeting. You would be surprised how empowering and fun it can be if family members can put things on the holiday planning agenda, take on roles as chair, secretary, or timekeeper and participate in developing a consensus.

Brainstorming for Fun and Engagement

Brainstorming can also be invigorating and fun for family members. We can brainstorm about various things, especially when people are early in the planning process. This includes where to go and what activities to do. Brainstorming involves generating as many ideas as possible within a prescribed period without any judgment or evaluation of the ideas. The whole idea is to get people involved in sharing their ideas. Brainstorming gives even the littlest person a voice without fear of being judged; with many different ideas, people also have more options regarding what might be pleasing to more people.

Budget-Friendly Activities

Choosing what to do over the holidays usually requires considering various factors, including budget and time. Even if families are going to spend the holiday on the island, some things can be done that are cheap and cheerful. Tourism is seasonal, with most visitors holidaying during the winter months. This means many local attractions are often reduced during the off-season months, providing opportunities to do fun activities, even if it is one or two; that is a lot when we plan and get people involved.

For example, I have worked with a family that was stretched financially. Still, they did several things over the summer, including visiting one local attraction and making a day of it. They caught the bus with four children in tow and carried a packed picnic lunch to reduce costs. They spoke about the fun they had visiting the attraction and the camaraderie and fun they experienced riding the bus and eating their picnic lunch.

Catering to Diverse Interests

Another consideration when planning a holiday is doing things that cater to people’s different interests. For illustration, everyone must be considered in families with people at different stages, including parents, teenagers, and young children. I was working with a family who were doing a cruise vacation; in one of the family meetings, they were able to come up with several things that might appeal to the two teen girls, including a spa day on one of the islands they visited, a zoo visit on another day trip for the two younger children, and several date nights on the ship for the parents.

Conclusion

Family holiday time goes beyond mere enjoyment; it is about nurturing family bonds and creating enduring memories. As summer approaches, it’s an opportune time for families to engage in fun, meaningful activities, whether at home or abroad. Economic constraints might limit overseas travel, but local adventures and creative home-based activities can be equally enjoyable. The key to this process is involving all family members in planning, ensuring everyone feels valued and heard. Having opportunities to meet as a family and engaging in brainstorming sessions can make planning more inclusive and exciting. By considering everyone's interests and balancing different factors, families can create a joyful and memorable holiday that strengthens their connections and brings joy.

Final Thoughts

Remember, it is not just what we do, but how we do it that truly matters.

Jomo Phillips, Couple & Family Therapist